Schrute to help bishops staff secret theology committee

The House of Bishops Theology Committee has retained Dwight K. Schrute to help screen candidates for the secret theology committee on same-sex marriage according to interview notes leaked to Episcopal Café. The interview subject is Pam Beesley, a receptionist at a fictitious mid-sized paper company in the Diocese of Bethlehem.


Dwight: I want you to be Assistant Regional Manager.

Pam: Really?

Dwight: Well, in a sense. Although, publicly I am going to retain the Assistant Regional Manager position.

Pam: You will be your own assistant.

Dwight: Correct, I need someone I can trust. But I would also like the title… to be secretly applied to you. Just stripped of its pomp and frills.

Pam: Okay. So… you would be the Regional Manager, and the Assistant Regional Manager. Andy is your number two. I would be the Secret Assistant Regional Manager.

Dwight: Mmmmmm, let’s call it Secret Assistant to the Regional Manager.

Pam: Mm-hmm.

Dwight: Do you accept?

Pam: Absolutely, I do.

So at least we’ve got one name.

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